Suicide. How Does A Good God Bring Good Out Of Such Devastation?

Before we get to today’s article, I just want to mention that am writing from the perspective of a man that has experienced many of the challenges of which I write…. and those spiritual battles continue daily. The articles are implications of what it means to obey the commandment to raise your children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. They require some reflection and are particularly for Christians who, as Peter would say, are diligently seeking to confirm their calling and are making every effort to supplement their faith. Said more succinctly, serious Christians. If you know other believers who desire to walk more faithfully with the Lord, please forward an article to them and tell them to sign up for future articles. Thanks so much!

I recently attended yet another memorial service for a young man who took his own life. We knew him and by all accounts, he was a beautiful and faithful Christian who was bearing much fruit in his life. Yet, he struggled for years to feel like he was measuring up to what he should be.

The memorial service was the best I have ever attended and by that, I mean that every speaker clearly presented facets of his life that told the story of who he was and the doctrine that was evident in their words was faithful to scripture. Furthermore, we experienced something that is almost unheard of in memorial service of a man that fell to such a great tragedy- we received details of the circumstances leading up to his death. And finally, one speaker carefully addressed our tendency to survey the event and make judgments that could have disparaged the young man or God relative to why this may have happened. I would call it “preemptive rebukes” and they were appropriate and welcome.

Still, questions remained unsettled in my heart, and I am sure, some others. Why now?

Why so young? Why him?

It was good for me to go once again to the scriptures to find guidance and although it isn’t exactly the same situation, I found that contemplating the situation immediately after the death of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, was helpful.

Think with me about the day Jesus died on the cross. He had made many claims during His life and at the young age of approximately 33 years old, His sudden arrest and death devastated His disciples and friends. Their minds must have been scrambling to process all the whats and whys of what had just taken place. Surely many would have rolled through series of questions such as, was He a Charlatan? Was He a liar? Did He die because of some sin they were unaware of? Had He become unfaithful? Some may even have become angry because they believed in Him and invested time with Him and now, it seemed all had come to nothing.

Of course, the questions and speculations around the sudden death of Jesus were questions that couldn’t have been further away from the truth of what had just happened. The problem for those people was that they simply did not have the knowledge or perspective that only God has.

Paul is particularly good in his Epistles where is anticipates and answers questions that the reader may have. Through the book of Romans, he teaches the great truths of God and the gospel and as he lays down truths that may have been hard to understand, he asks question after question such as-

Does their unfaithfulness nullify the faithfulness of God? (3:3)
That God is unrighteous to inflict wrath on us? (vs. 5)
Do we then overthow the law by this faith? (vs. 31)
Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? (6:1)
Is there injustice with God? (9:14)

It is good for us to ask questions and getting answers clarifies our confusion and can lead to a better understanding of God and His word. However, because God is God and we are not, He chooses to provide information as He deems fit for our good and His glory. After providing so many answers to critical questions in the book of Romans, we come to the end of the book and Paul is compelled to pause and acknowledge that all of God’s ways are higher and greater than ours and in a burst of adoration, he declares, Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who has been his counselor? Or who has given a gift to him that he might be repaid? For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen (11:33-36).

Going back to Jesus and all of the people who were dismayed and emotionally destroyed at His death, we know that those people soon began to get clarity on His death and glorious resurrection. Then, in Acts 2:22-23 we get this, Men of Israel, hear these words: Jesus of Nazareth, a man attested to you by God with mighty works and wonders and signs that God did through him in your midst, as you yourselves know— this Jesus, delivered up according to the definite plan and foreknowledge of God, you crucified and killed by the hands of lawless men.

In one sentence, we learn an amazing truth. No matter what the Romans or the Jews did to kill Jesus, it was God’s plan that it transpire at the exact time and way that God intended. Yes, we do know from the Old Testament that the Messiah would come and be a suffering servant, but no one knew the time or the exact way it would take place.

This would be true for my friend as well as all of us. I can say with certainty that while I look at this event as a sudden tragedy, my Christian friend died and went to be with Christ because God had decided before my friend was ever born that my friend would die on that very day. This is God’s plan for my friend, and I am reminded that he never did belong to any of us- he belonged to God. He was a gift to his family and friends, but he was owned by His Creator as one of His creatures, and after he claimed Christ as his Savior, he became God’s child, bought with the precious blood of Jesus Christ.

Stretching my perspective to align with God brings me some comfort, but it does not wash away the pain and suffering of those who knew the person and it should not be minimized. Nor should the processing and recovery from that pain be rushed or suppressed. Just as the life of that person was a gift from God, so were the relationships and experiences of those who were connected to him. It is good to remember all of the wonderful times and the amazing person that he was and all of the memories should be tenderly cherished. And for the time that we had with that person, great thanksgiving should be made to God, especially when we know that the Lord brought him to a saving knowledge of Christ on this earth.

But there is one more question: can we see how God is faithful to the promise of Romans 8:28 right now? Is He working all things for our good and His glory? It may be hard to turn our minds in this direction but if we can, we will see a great deal of God’s work in this tragedy and be encouraged. What has happened since that unfortunate day of my friend’s death?

It has galvanized the church family (both in Texas and in Georgia) to action.
It centers us to be more Kingdom minded.
It compels us to serve those impacted by the loss and suffering.
It compels us to give financial support. More than $100,000 was given to support the surviving family in the first 11 days after the incident.
It makes us think about the hearts of others. Who is struggling, who is walking with them, should I be bearing their burden with them? (Galatians 6:2)
It causes us to think about our own hearts- if that can happen to him, might it happen to me? (Philippians 2:12)
It makes us to be theologians and discover or rediscover important truths of the Bible.
It reveals how dependent we are on the Lord for everything all of the time.
It presses in on all of the nonsense that we do every day and demands us to be sober about our Christian lives. Maybe it’s time to read Ecclesiastes again.
It compels us to number our days (Psalm 90).
It makes us sing songs to God for His salvation.
It reminds us that we are but sojourners (Hebrews 11:16)

Can you see it? God has provided a tremendous wave of grace that has compelled His people to think and do many important and wonderful things. And if you consider the things that are more action oriented on the list above, you can see that the law of God is being fulfilled- that you love one another. Yes, in the midst of the pain of loss, God has brought good for us and He is glorifying Himself through this time. He is an amazing God!

I have one more thought for you. It is far too common that young men who are taking their own lives have been known to have strong thoughts of inadequacy. I believe that the constant bombardment of messages from TV, the media, and social networking has set a devilishly false bar of what it means to succeed. The bar of success is built on looking a certain way that is in line with the latest sexy body types, hair, clothing, and scents. It is a bar that is reached if you achieve particular financial levels or can be excellent in a sport, and all of that must come with popularity evidenced by followers, clicks, or “friends.”

This system of success is put forth by worldly and foolish people and it is a bar of success that will either damage us in pursuit of it, or completely empty our souls if we reach it. If we talk about it amongst ourselves, Christians will deny that they are caught up in it, but if we look at what we are actually doing each day, it is clear to see that we are all affected by this drone of messages. For some reason, young men seem to be more vulnerable to this trap. Please talk to a young man, maybe your son, about this. It is a trap that will be put in front of him again and again and he needs to know the truth. He is valuable because God says he is valuable and God’s standard for his life is simply to obey the Lord and the Lord will direct his steps.

VIDEO of this week’s article: https://youtu.be/nAL-4Qbh0Ms

RECORDINGS OF GOOD STUFF TO LISTEN TO ON THE GO:

The Duties of Parents : https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-rediscovering-the-lost/id1692401602

Why Should I Believe Anything About Christ? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-why-should-i-believe/id1692832161

Choose Your Master: God Or Money https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-choose-your-master-god/id1683382182