Before we get to today’s article, I just want to mention that am writing from the perspective of a man that has experienced many of the challenges of which I write…. and those spiritual battles continue daily. The articles are implications of what it means to obey the commandment to raise your children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. They require some reflection and are particularly for Christians who, as Peter would say, are diligently seeking to confirm their calling and are making every effort to supplement their faith. Said more succinctly, serious Christians. If you know other believers who desire to walk more faithfully with the Lord, please forward an article to them and tell them to sign up for future articles. Thanks so much!
I want to go back to the verses that we looked at last week and bring up a few points that will hopefully guard us against falling into the idea that what God was commanding was good for the Jews only. This is easy to do because we may not think deeply enough to make application for today’s Christian parents.
As a reminder, listen to Deuteronomy 6:6-10 one more time: And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
So in the last article, I wrote about the modern day equivalents of boxes of scripture hanging from our heads or hands such as our Bibles and various signs that many Christians decorate their homes (or even cars) with. I want to be clear that I personally love to see these reminders in my home, especially the one framed poster that we have that has the many names for Jesus in the Bible. But my concern is that having the signs in our home without the conversations that God expects to take place in our home is not enough.
You have heard the oft used joke that just because you are in McDonalds, it doesn’t make you a hamburger. Well, in the same way, just because you decorate your home with scripture, it doesn’t mean that your home is a Christian one in the way that God demands. We can fill our homes with signs, ornaments, Bibles, or great Christian books. We can effectively mark off our home for God using all of these things, treating it like some special sacrament of grace, but it will not satisfy God’s requirement for Christian parents.
Christian parents must teach their children about God on an ongoing basis and make Him a natural part of the family’s daily conversation. And don’t be fooled- training is taking place all the time. If parents line the walls of their homes with reminders of Christ yet rarely talk about Him, the child is taught that the reminders mean little, and the parent’s Christianity is a lightweight Christianity that lacks the seriousness that true Christianity requires. In fact, placing the name of God on a wall decoration without the concurrent discussions about the Lord is just a violation of the third commandment to not take His name in vain. Am I being a little extreme? Is God being extreme? As Paul would say, “may it never be!” No, I just think that we have all gotten so used to saying God’s name in almost any context, that we have become insensitive to His awesome holiness.
So, I hope you can see that before we can be used by God to shape and mold our children, we have to change. We have to develop a mindset that has us making references to God all the time like He is in the room because, guess what? He is in the room. This needs to be from our hearts with sincerity, embracing the fact that we are walking with God all day, every day. Our kids need to see that we aren’t just talkin’ the talk without walkin’ the walk.
So then, how do we make this very important command to parents real in our homes? Well, my kids are grown and out of the home, so I had to think back and reflect on our own experiences and sadly, I will confess that we often fell short of the mark. One of the sinful things (I’m not going to confess them all!) that we did was how we talked about the sermon or church members after we left church on Sundays.
Thankfully, we did talk about the content of the sermon with them and tried to draw out discussion around one or two of the main points. This was the good part. The bad part was allowing our children to overhear my wife and I critiquing the sermon in a negative way. There were always opportunities to talk about others in the congregation in godly ways, but we probably flushed that good parenting with talking negatively about other church members. And the horrifying thought here is that we were training our children how to think through it all.
How else can you habitually talk about the Lord as a natural part of the family’s life? Here are a few ideas:
Church related
- Have regular discussions about Sunday school or midweek youth group meetings. What did you learn? What does that mean for you?
- Review points that were made in the sermon in the car on the way home from church. How much was understood; what does it mean for you?
At Home
- Discuss how God is informing changes in the home such as a decision to move, changing jobs, change schools.
- End of the day dinner review. What happened today in your life?
- Family devotions. Tremendous time to talk about God and everything!
- After movies or other media. Should we have seen or heard that? Why or why not? Who is the hero? What was the underlying message of the movie?
- Prayers before bedtime. A great time for thanksgiving, praise, and requests.
Events
- Look to review interactions that your children had after every birthday party or event. Were there things that happened that God was pleased with? Not pleased with?
- Driving home and discussing things that happened after family gatherings.
- Resurrection Sunday and Christmas. Great opportunities to talk about the horror of sin, God’s gracious plan of salvation as well as the loves that the world has in contrast to these holidays.
- What happened at school today? This is a huge opportunity that cannot be neglected especially if your child attends a non-Christian school of any kind. The constant bombardment of worldly thinking on the child’s heart must be confronted daily.
By the way, I will soon be publishing a new podcast on education to help parents think deeply about the effects of a non-Christian school on children and the Biblical reasons for Christian homeschooling or enrolling your child in a Christian day school.
Christian parents have much to think about! See you next time.
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Last modified: March 24, 2023
