Should We Fear The Rise Of The Trad Wife?

Before we get to today’s article, I just want to mention that am writing from the perspective of a man that has experienced many of the challenges of which I write…. and those spiritual battles continue daily. The articles are implications of what it means to obey the commandment to raise your children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. They require some reflection and are particularly for Christians who, as Peter would say, are diligently seeking to confirm their calling and are making every effort to supplement their faith. Said more succinctly, serious Christians. If you know other believers who desire to walk more faithfully with the Lord, please forward an article to them and tell them to sign up for future articles. Thanks so much!

Should We Fear The Rise Of The Trad Wife?

If you were born in America 1950 or later, you have been in the Petri dish of cultural change. I was born in 1956 and during my most formative years (let’s say my first 20 years), I lived on the launchpad of the sexual revolution. There is a lot that I don’t remember being shocked by because I didn’t have a historical perspective that would enable me to see how utterly insane things were. Television was the primary lens through which I saw what was going on in the world, but the hippies, free love, rampant drug use, and women protesting in large cities absent of clothing, just didn’t seem real to me.

Maybe that was because I lived in a rural area and had parents who were most concerned about being able to feed their kids and raise them to be responsible citizens. They attended church weekly and did their best to teach their children to lead moral (if not Christian) lives and believed in things like manners, honor, loyalty, and hard work. They, like many Americans, also believed that the vows they made to each other in marriage was a commitment that should never be broken.

They also had well defined roles in the home. Sure, there was overlap such as in the area of discipline (mom during the day; dad when he got home from work), but the main duty of dad was to provide for the family and the main duty of mom was to nurture the kids and take care of the household. This might sound boring to today’s ears, but my mom loved pouring herself into her children and my dad reveled in seeing the fruit of his hard labor. They didn’t want anything else. And for most families, this way of family life worked. Actually, it worked great and was the normal way of living life for most people for about 6,000 years.

However, the demands that were being made and the result of so-called new freedoms, continued to roll out over the next 40 years. In many instances, the changes represent dramatic change from the past; in some cases a complete 180-degree turn.

I was struck this week by an article that ran in CNBC called, “The Rise Of The Tradwife- Why Some Women Say They Are Opting Out Of Work.” The article is interesting because of the way it portrays the traditional family life. I’ll just quote and comment.

The first line says, “If TikTok is any guide, more women are taking a traditional approach to romantic partnerships: Some say they are even opting out of the workforce entirely in favor of the so-called “soft life,” centered around their home, their family and their own wellbeing.” Stop. Note they call it romantic partnerships, not marriage and taking the traditional approach requires the commitment of marriage- but times have changed. Also, they describe the traditional approach as the soft life. I’m not sure if they intend that to be a positive or negative descriptor, but I can tell you that the traditional approach, if done with a passion and dedication, is no soft road.

The article continues and note how foreign this is to the modern women of the world and how easily it is dismissed. “The thing about tradwives is that it feels very different; it is an escape from a lot of people’s reality,” she said.” Experts say it’s a facade. Evidence shows this is something few women are actually doing, and it’s not a realistic lifestyle to aspire to.

Now we get to the underlying philosophy that has been drilled home to women especially these last 60 years: the traditional home that was led by the man is patriarchy, and that is something we have strived to get away from. “These are old ideas with fresh taglines, “Fair Play” author Eve Rodsky says of tradwives and the related social media trend of stay-at-home girlfriends, or SAHGs: “That is the definition of patriarchy — there’s nothing new here.

Ms. Rodsky goes on to say, “Tradwives are pretending they have agency over their choices,” Rodsky said. But forgoing paid labor comes at an economic cost. “The tradwife or stay-at-home girlfriends are taking huge economic risks,” she added. “What that really means is that you don’t have economic security.” Social media portrays a glamorized view of what that life looks like but “that is not realistic,” Francis said. Financial dependence can also mean a loss of power or control, she added.”

So, there it is- it’s about power and control. This is what many would believe is the most important thing to a woman today. Get it and make sure you don’t lose it. This is what will give you security. Well, that is what has not become a reality. While there are more women working than ever and making more money than ever, the rate of women experiencing the negative effects of stress on the job is higher than ever and the levels of anxiety and loneliness in our country is at a record high. Women are starting to rethink how they are spending their lives and whether or not the so called “power and control” is worth it.

But how did we get here? What is the underlying cause of all of these societal changes over these last 60 years? I believe there is a close correlation between the Christian faith and the changes. That is, as fewer people in America are true practicing Christians, the door has been opened to all kinds of foolish thinking that has systematically destroyed the desirability of the traditional family. Instead of seeing value and fulfillment in the traditional roles of men and women, many see bondage and oppression.

We should not be surprised at the outcome. In fact, it is true that many traditional families have been terrible experiences for everyone involved- husband, wife, and kids. This happens when husbands and wives do not obey the instructions that God has given in His Bible, and we try to do things our own way. Sadly, the world sees this and concludes that there is something better than traditional marriage, but the answer is not doing something else- it’s doing marriage as God designed it to be. If we would do it God’s way,  joy and fulfillment will follow.

It is also true that pursuing the traditional family model is a greater financial challenge for some today. Everything, especially housing, is more expensive. But here again, the Christian must think Biblically about this. Many Christians assume having certain things is not a maybe but a must. In other words, we “must” have a house, we “must” have fun cars, we “must” go away on vacation twice a year. However, I have witnessed many young Christians who are thinking necessities rather than musts. They are prioritizing making babies and making a home whether the home is owned or rented. They are getting creative on their fun trips, avoiding the big spends that others do whether they have the money or not. They are working on contentment, something the Apostle Paul said was great gain. They are focused on budgeting wisely and having financial discipline and they are finding that they can do just fine with dad working and mom at home (and some moms are doing part time jobs from home).

One more point- many surveys and studies have found that the younger generations are longing for experiences. This is also confirmed by the travel and leisure industry as airplanes are reported to be full and cruise lines are doing great business. And here is the irony- families are settling for experiences that give short term fun without any long-term value, while ignoring the experience of walking with God. There is no greater joy than traveling through this crazy life and seeing God provide, and change, and bless, while we await the next life full of wonder and love forever.

This is the message that we must get through to our children. It is required of those parents who believe that they should be obeying Ephesians 6:4. That is, you must bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord, not the instruction of this world.

 Dig deep, brothers and sisters, and I’ll see you next time.

THIS WEEK’S SPOTLIGHT:

Title: All Things For Good Written By Thomas Watson And Read By Michael Lee

Description: One of the great Puritans, Watson writes based on the great promise from God that all things work together for good to those that love God. The book will expand your faith in God’s promises and His attributes and give a great comfort to your soul.

Apple Podcast (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/all-things-for-good-by-thomas-watson-and-read-by-michael-lee/id1703108941)

YouTube (https://youtu.be/cCMPuNsv6dE).

Read it online at www.ModernPuritans.com

Title: Sinners In The Hands Of An Angry God, By Jonathan Edwards And Read By Michael Lee

Description: This famous sermon by Jonathan Edwards will sober you up to the awesomeness of God. It is updated in modern English by Modern Puritans.com

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-sinners-in-the-hands/id1695783947

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQjGDaS1xyeRC8vUJFwsxxaX

Title: The Duties Of Parents From The Booklet By J.C. Ryle. Read By Michael Lee

Description: From the famous booklet written by Pastor J.C. Ryle. Pastor Ryle gives us 17 points of Christian parenting on which to focus our attention. His words are timeless and apply to parenting today as much as it did 100 years ago.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-the-duties-of/id1676664853

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQgfoZGiRgzptFs7g07vkwU5

“Why Should I Believe Anything About Jesus Christ?” Written By Various Authors And Read By Michael Lee

Description: This Podcast features three famous recordings of booklets written by John Blanchard that will strengthen your own understanding on the death and resurrection of Christ and also serve as a great evangelistic tool for a friend or family member. The first booklet is called, “Ultimate Questions.” The second booklet is called, “Why The Cross?” And the third booklet is called, “Jesus, Dead Or Alive?”

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-why-should-i-believe/id1692832161

YouTube: Each of the John Blanchard booklets has its own recording. See below.

Ultimate Questions.  https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQggMxnbCbkLux2C6QB1W0VG

Jesus- Dead Or Alive? https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQjeqfP9L1olkHULFCNHVDDF

Why The Cross? https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQgJEuKxJL0dgjCDM85tyqrQ

Christian Behavior, written by John Bunyan. This is a wonderful fairly short book written by the great John Bunyan to help Christians understand that their lives should be full of good works! Bunyan takes us to Titus 3:7-8 and brings practical application to all areas of the Christian life. You will be blessed by this great saint!

Apple Podcast:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-christian-behavior-by/id1716196912

YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQjUQ_MpGbnqwrBVi7TgRKi3

Choose Your Master: God Or Money. The links are immediately below-

Description: This is one of the most written about topics in the Bible because it is one of the most dangerous to the Christian. Listen in on the good and bad experiences of the author and strongly consider the Bible’s teaching on stewardship.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-choose-your-master-god/id1683382182

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQiHoB3-tBm1qDDbxxpQAvTl

Title: All Things For Good Written By Thomas Watson And Read By Michael Lee

Description: One of the great Puritans, Watson writes based on the great promise from God that all things work together for good to those that love God. The book will expand your faith in God’s promises and His attributes and give a great comfort to your soul.

Apple Podcast (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/all-things-for-good-by-thomas-watson-and-read-by-michael-lee/id1703108941)

YouTube (https://youtu.be/cCMPuNsv6dE).

Read it online at www.ModernPuritans.com

Title: Critical Considerations For Christian Parents About Your Child’s Education, By Michael Lee

Description: As we search the Bible for answers to the question: How shall we raise our children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord,” we can see that the system for educating children was done primary by the parents in the home. However, the world in which we live now is quite different and the vast majority of parents use an educational system that is outside of the home and is that system is called the public schools, or the government schools.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-critical-considerations/id1678162250

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQjnvjc7QuytT2V3lVr53oqa

Title: From Religion To Christ, Written By Peter Jeffery And Read By Michael Lee

Description:  Tired of the many systems of religion that you have observed or been part of in the past? Are you ready to say goodbye to religion? The author Peter Jeffery, agrees! Doing “religion” is empty and will not get you to heaven. There is something more-something much greater. Take a careful listen through this podcast and discover what a real relationship with God actually looks like.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-from-religion-to-christ/id1687134464

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQg_lCngBTcjs_dXT1VYvYWA

Title: Rediscovering The Lost Treasure Of Family Worship. Written By Jerry Marcellino And Read By Michael Lee

Description: Family Worship was once the normal practice that most Christian parents led in their homes. Led by either parent, the children would be taught daily from the word of God, pray and sing songs. It was considered to be a vital part of the Christian life.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-rediscovering-the-lost/id1692401602

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQgNq7asslVBsKyq0FC3arMs

Title: Thoughts For Young Men From The Book By J.C. Ryle. Read By Michael Lee

Description: A wonderful book of Biblical truth and advice for young men. Helpful to parents as well as the young men themselves. Full of wisdom for a life filled with Christ. J.C. Ryle (1816-1900) served God in England as a pastor and teacher for more than 40 years. His words are still being used by the Lord today and are applicable to all Christians in all times.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-thoughts-for-young-men/id1673847428

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQixZIaBE95_JRojVSkzq1nl

Title: Stand Firm Written By Peter Jeffery and Read By Michael Lee

Description: So you just became a Christian and now what? Get ready for a life of walking with the Lord and experiencing the joy of knowing you have peace with God. However, you also have an enemy- the devil. Peter Jeffery wants to help by teaching you about the battle with the wicked one and how you can STAND FIRM against his attacks!

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-stand-firm-written-by/id1681861976

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQjhDFeGYG5Tt5EWjeuz-e1p

Title: The Duties Of Parents From The Booklet By J.C. Ryle. Read By Michael Lee

Description: From the famous booklet written by Pastor J.C. Ryle. Pastor Ryle gives us 17 points of Christian parenting on which to focus our attention. His words are timeless and apply to parenting today as much as it did 100 years ago.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-the-duties-of/id1676664853

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQgfoZGiRgzptFs7g07vkwU5

Title: Choose Your Master: God Or Money. Written And Read By Michael Lee

Description: This is one of the most written about topics in the Bible because it is one of the most dangerous to the Christian. Listen in on the good and bad experiences of the author and strongly consider the Bible’s teaching on stewardship.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-choose-your-master-god/id1683382182

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQiHoB3-tBm1qDDbxxpQAvTl

Title: A Call To Prayer By J.C. Ryle. Read By Michael Lee

Description: This is a passionate plea from the famous preacher and teacher, J.C. Ryle. Although these words were penned more than 100 years ago, the need and application for today’s Christian is greater than ever.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-a-call-to-prayer-by/id167288080

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAh2MVKU1VQjaXXgO8P1U-bBFkEMCwdYR

Title: Precious Remedies Against Satan’s Devices From The Book By Thomas Brooks. Read By Michael Lee

Description: (This is one that you can listen to a “precious remedy” each day). Thomas Brooks, born in 1608, was a Puritan preacher who wrote a number of essays during his time with possibly the foremost entitled, “Precious Remedies Against Satan’s Devices.” In writing the book’s dedication, he wrote, “Christ, the scripture, your own hearts, and Satan’s devices, are the four prime things that should be first and most studied and searched. If any cast off the study of these they cannot be safe here, nor happy hereafter.” Brooks believed that all Christians have particular weaknesses in their faith and those weaknesses would be exploited in some way by Satan.

Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cherish-ephesians-6-4-presents-precious-remedies-against/id1671364198

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Last modified: July 9, 2024